Many marriages do recover from an affair. The main difference for those that do recover is a desire to find a way to work through it and a commitment on the part of both partners to do what they need to do to make it work.
In couples who have experienced an affair, it may be quite difficult to walk the path through the “yuck” and out again. Often it is back and forth and in and out of easier and harder times.
Ending affairs are rarely easy and often they go through several “endings” before they are truly over.
Letting go of the hurt, anger and resentment takes time and, again, hard work.
Forgiveness does not come easy. Often it is harder for the partner who had the affair to forgive him or herself than it is for the betrayed one.
Getting over loving feelings for the affaire’ and falling back in love with a spouse may also take some time.
The commitment, desire and motivation to work together is an important factor that encourages spouses to hang in and solve the problems related to or caused by the affair.
One research study noted that 70% of couples who had that desire and commitment reported recovery from the aftermath and were satisfied that they made the decision to remain in the marriage.
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